I don’t think your worries sound all that extreme or even unrealistic. But it’s real and you shouldn’t brush it away as a symptom of your anxiety.
He was flirting with other women on Snapchat and you sensibly wonder about whether he’s going to be faithful. You ask if this is an “actual issue” of if it’s just your anxiety. Tell him that if you’re going to be together, you need him to understand that it’s not cool for him to flirt with other women when things get rough.
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What matters is that you find a way to talk about important things as you build a relationship that works for both of you.
Even if this not a rejection — and I don’t think this is one — I know it can feel like it. (It’s OK to tease him.) Tell him that you’d like to know more about where he’s coming from — more than that he just “generally waits.” And tell him why you are ready. The reason you should really talk this out is the same reason why I don’t like the word “abnormal.” It doesn’t matter what he does “generally,” just as it doesn’t matter what’s “normal.” This is just about the two of you and nobody else.
Do I bring up my concerns and talk to him, or should I just try to ignore it and not overthink it? I get a whole lot of questions from readers who basically want to know: Do I have to talk about this? We all just want things to turn out for the best with the least effort and anxiety possible.
This thing is driving me crazy, but if I ignore it, won’t it just go away? We all want things to be easy, for relationships to come naturally, for our partners to just read our minds.
This is a conversation you need to have with your boyfriend, even if it’s awkward — and even if it’s hard to bring it up and actually talk about it for more than a few seconds. And you say you “know he truly loves and wants to be with me.” Before you take it personally, be a little brave, remind him how much you care about him, and tell him that you just don’t understand why he doesn’t want to have sex with someone as hot and amazing as yourself.
A week before being diagnosed, we were taking pictures together on Snapchat and I noticed he had been snapping some random girls.
Some messages were flirty or stated we had been rocky.
We got in a fight but he said none of the snaps meant anything.
You don’t have to dwell on the past, but you can’t erase it either.