Somehow when it comes to gender, Black men often pull out their own checklist for Black women before giving us that same respect. Save yourself the headache of getting cussed out by a sister who is hip to your reindeer games and locked and loaded to shut you down.
Piggybacking on the last point, men often don’t realize that they advise women under the premise that “good girls” deserve respect, while “bad girls” deserve whatever they get.
Are you sincerely trying to be a supportive friend/partner or are you annoyed with her behavior and attempting to put her in her place?
A lot of times our supposedly unbiased “advice” is actually a guise to voice hidden resentments that we’re too afraid to voice directly.
He explained that sometimes he would date women, and it felt like they were in competition with his job.
He explained that he was sometimes in situations were women were more interested in the relationship, than him being a success.
But the right woman will help a man in his career also. Because a woman that believes in her man and supports him, he’ll do almost anything to make sure she is happy.
I’m really grateful that Devon and Meagan are using their voices and platforms and sharing the good, the bad, and the ugly about relationships and the power that comes from honoring God.
For more tips and tales from their journey to love, buy The Wait.
Question: What do you think of De Von and Meagan’s story?
Sigmund Freud spoke at length about the Madonna–whore complex, which is basically a form of mentally triggered impotence that develops in men who see women as either pure Madonnas or debased prostitutes and nothing in between.
These men can have great sex outside of their marriage because “bad girls” are meant for that sort of thing, but they struggle to have the same sexually satisfying experiences with the women they’re committed to because in their minds “good girls” are meant to be more righteous and puritanical.
READ MORE: Killer Mike offers kids free haircuts as they head back to school While most men don’t have this extreme psychological complex, shades of the , but the messaging is still the same: some women deserve to be treated and respected as human beings while others deserve to be treated like objects to own and direct.