It is important that there be a “pre” engagement period of time.
(Note: As soon as I say Christian dating guide, every single Christian reading this will think they are an exception and the timing noted does not apply to them. One of the strangest phenomenons that I have observed is that singles dating behavior is more common than most of us think.
I encourage you to not look for the “exception” but where you can build the type of Christian dating relationship that will serve you and your partner well for years to come.) 1.
There is an attraction to each other and Christian singles immediately (or soon thereafter) think they have found their soul mate.
Candidly, there is really little more in the Christian dating relationship during this stage than “physical attraction”. There is a temptation for Christian singles to begin saying, “I love you” during this fantasy stage. The emphasis should be upon enjoying each other’s company and building a FRIENDSHIP and refraining from going any further. After 2 to 3 months of this type of dating and it is mutually agreed, the Christian dating relationship can move into an exclusive dating arrangement.
The couple should be able to enjoy the blessings of God as well as family and friends as they move into a marriage that has been well planned and confirmed in a healthy process.
They can be assured that they have taken the steps to assure a long and satisfying marriage.
It would be especially helpful to take the inventories mentioned above to the counselor for their input. It is very important that the couple receive affirmations from family and friends during this stage.
If they do not (unless there is a good reason), the couple should take the time to listen to the concerns and take steps to ensure that they are embracing and working through them. Once a couple arrives at the point that they “know” that they want to be married and have all the affirmations that they can receive, they can move from the Christian dating stage with confidence into the engagement stage. I do not recommend a prolonged engagement once the couple decides to get married.
Our emotions need to “grow” into this type of deep Christian dating relationship.
Pushing the pace causes areas of each other’s character to not be observed.
For example: Can the couple enjoy their alone time as well as their together time?